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Tuesday 20 July 2010

Day 5

Losing Control

“The quarantine areas are becoming more and more difficult to control,” says Met Police Chief Sir Ian Blair…
In a controversial interview with (everyone’s favourite paper) the Daily Mail, Met Chief, Blair, argues that efforts to hold back and destroy the ’hordes’ of Walking Teddy bears are failing and that the Government is too late and should concentrate efforts on helping the un-infected evacuate to areas of safety which are becoming fewer and fewer apart.

It is now common knowledge that the Walking Ted can only be destroyed by removing the head or destroying the brain; but where possible, do not approach these creatures. They are extremely aggressive. One bite can cause a terrible fever, a dreadful rage and an extreme case of the munchies!?

Evacuees are being ushered onto ferries in the UK ports of Aberdeen, Newcastle, Hull, Dover, Portsmouth, Folkestone, Plymouth and Swansea in the hope that they can be safely secured on smaller islands surrounding the UK, such as the Isle of Mann, the Isle of Wight, the Orkney’s, Jersey and Guernsey.

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